The Mantra of Family Comes First

photo credit: Mama’s – (license)

At Prestige over the weekend, I heard a presenter say that family comes first. This isn’t the first time I’ve heard this advice but it’s becoming more prevalent. I generally hear this advice from those who are living comfortably, have two kids or more, and/or have gone through the startup process more than once.

I’m a distributed worker who receives a check every two weeks. I’m married, have no kids, and write about WordPress for a living. Putting family first should be easy but it’s not. The last two years as a distributed worker, I’ve put work before family unless it’s an emergency.

Two weeks ago, my wife and I had a serious conversation about the way I work and how it has negatively impacted our marriage. I’m a late owl and on most nights, my wife sleeps alone. As a distributed worker, I get to make the rules and put myself in the best environment to get the job done.

The conversation with my wife involved words not fit for reproduction but everything she said was right. I’m spending too much time on digital devices and not enough with her. Our conversation was the wake up call I didn’t know I needed.

It’s not easy putting family first all the time. Some argue that you need to put yourself before family so that you can provide for them. Others find a critical balance between spending time with family and getting the job done.

How do you put family first when there are bills that need to be paid, sites to be built, and a constant deluge of work to be done? Please share your thoughts, experiences, and advice in the comments.